Posted by: tlnemethy | March 1, 2013

Layoff Heard Round The World

Totally stretching the truth with that title, btw. Not so much heard ’round the world as it was heard through rumbles spread throughout the barren wasteland of cubicles. I’m upset, but definitely not as upset as some of the people who joined me at the guillotine. We were hired by a temp agency, meaning that we were temporary, and therefore could be axed at any moment. Sure, we were baited with glorious tidbits about being hired full-time after the seasonal work ended, pizza parties for our dedication, and the simplicities of our tasks, but it had to have an expiration date.

We ended our day normally enough, knowing that some people would be given the heave-ho, but that was to be expected. Phase one of our project was complete, and that left the phase one employees either transferring to phase two work or being shown the door. Apparently though, since we were temps and the full-time employees under a different branch’s employment were being booted they were trained to take over our jobs and we then had to pack up our gear and hit the road on another job prowl.

As much of a bummer as this is, I’m getting a slight kick out of all the terminology for getting laid off. Downsizing. Termination. Reduction in labor. Fired. Shown the door. Escorted from the premises. Canned. Rejoining the ranks of the unemployed. Becoming jobless…

I’ve never seen the parking lot clear so quickly after work. Usually there are people just chatting and loitering and generally ambling to their cars, but not today after being ushered into the dreaded tiny conference room with tables ominously not bearing donuts or other celebratory party wares. Emotions ranged from pissed to shocked and then everyone just rushed out in a huff to clean their desks. One good thing though was that this layoff gave me the chance to get the digits of my cubicle mates. We are bonding in our misery.


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